The Land of Happy

…who deserve my sympathy, simply because, they aren’t real people and luckily my “good deeds”  will all bounce right back like my downstairs incompetent tenant’s checks.

(every show is fair game, so cartoons, reality, drama, blah blah blah, you get it…)
Starting with…

5. Leopold “Butters” Stotch – South Park

Oh Butters, you innocent little whipping boy. So naive. So sad. So funny.

4. Abe “Grampa” Simpson – The Simpsons

His senility serves up so much funnies. Maybe the only time you can laugh at a pathetic senior, besides 10 feet away from them on the streets.

3. Matthew Mara AKA Rickety Cricket – Its Always Sunny In Philadelphia

“Guys! You gotta make it sexy…I did it…and I made it soooo sexy…I have achieved total sexiness…its all hips and nips!…hey, you guys have more blow?” said the totally whacked-out-on-coke ex-priest.

2. Spencer “Spenny” Nolan Rice – Kenny vs. Spenny

Somethings done unto poor Spenny:
- had sex (multiple times) with a transvestite
- unknowingly took many doses of acid
- was a human bidet for a few minutes
- stood naked in a meat freezer
- humped by a goat
This list goes on, but you get the picture.

1. Theodore “Ted” Buckland – Scrubs

Lastly, my favorite pathetic loser who gave me the idea to start this list, Ted the Lawyer.
Soooo pathetic, I sometimes do feel bad but laugh every time he tries to commit suicide. Poor Ted.
(btw, Scrubs only get better as the season progresses. I haven’t pulled a out loud laugh until season 3. Usually the first season should be awesome, but I digress, this show is gets better.)

The Top 5 TV losers.
There are a few honorable mentions, but this post is long enough.

Peace bitches.

-DbL.